It's Christmas time. And Christmas time means that, for the one time each year, I head home to Oklahoma. And that one time I head home to Oklahoma, one inevitable thing happens.
The plumbing breaks.
Yes. Three years in a row now (skipping over that year I spent in CA), when I come home to loverly Seminole, OK, the plumbing has backed up. It has happened 1) while I was in the shower (great gobs of blue-y water coming up through the shower drain), 2) before I managed to get a shower (aforementioned blue-y water but without the benefit of clean hair), and 3) while doing MY laundry (blue-y water in the green bathroom; soapy water on the kitchen floor, damp laundry).
Last year we got a hotel room across the street so we could take showers. And pee.
It's two days before Christmas. I am sleeping on a couch because my bedroom no longer contains a bed, the temperature for tonight is -1 F, and I have damp, damp laundry. And let's just say my father is not a "fix-er" kind of person -- when he was informed of the problem as he came in, he muttered something like, "I hate living in this dump" before storming to the bedroom. Upon emerging, he asked me if I'd like to try a Manhattan.
Screw showers -- I'm going to go drown myself in bourbon!
Thursday, December 23, 2004
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